Big Red Snack Foam

It's dark in here. dim, unpleasant.
airless, even.
i paid for this, good money for this
what the fuck?

this episode. has not one bit
that made me smile
except. for:

BIG RED SNACK FOAM

and oh god the music
it's so very sad
how can you suck so hard
and still persist
and persist
and persist
and save me Jeebus from this aural assault!

Now, you may be saying to yourself
"That about describes this crap right here to a T"
And if so, I'll try not to cry.
But it won't be easy.
Maybe if I made it a sensitive ballad like this:

Big Red Snack Foam
Is a symbol of our love
It's big, and red, and foamy
But try not to think about
What it's made of

No? Well, that's my best shot.
You do better in half an hour
On three hours of sleep
With a title like

BIG RED SNACK FOAM

boring music, boring hosts
I guess the juggler's not half bad
for an amateur
but tv has ruined me for local acts
you better rock and rock HARD baby,
or i'll hate you, to your very core

like i hate this episode
with not one bit
that made me smile
except. for:

BIG RED SNACK FOAM

Ok, so the rolling ball of townspeople was funny too. But not cackle funny, or guffaw funny, like

BIG RED SNACK FOAM